Only the Good Die Young

This one's for you Mamma


I tried my hardest to make you as comfortable as possible. Holding your hand watching you go into an anxiety attack wondering why you couldn't breathe or talk. Oh Mamma, I should have stayed with you...I shouldn't have left your side. But I know that you are in a better place, and my jealously sides with God for He now has you and I wish I did. My heart will always have a hole in it, no one will ever replace you. You were kind, generous, loving, and warm. Life will go on without you, but I will never forget you. I won't let my children grow up not knowing your love for those around you and your furry kids. I love you Mamma, I always will.

In Memory of Rachel A. Wheelan
March 3, 1960-September 30, 2008
"Only The Good Die Young"

Life

I have found a new idea of life.

Life is a someone that has put a flaming bag of sh*t on your front porch but doesn't ring the door bell. Sitting back laughing every time you say "Jesus Chris what is that smell?!" Sooner or later I will find the flaming bag of sh*t on my door step and put it out. But I feel that that time is as far away as I am from Pluto.

I sit here at home wondering what will happen when my mother passes. Sitting here trying to make her as comfortable as possible until the end. I wish I could do more for her, but I know that all my attempts will fail because this is the road that life has taken us to. I don't know what to do, it seems as though the problems, stress, and worries just keep piling up. Not only do I have to take care of my mother as she grows closer to a better place I have to take care of her wishes at the end, take care of an 11 yr old and a 2 yr old, figure out how I will fight for custody of my child when I am 1300 miles away taking care of the teenager that the stroke has dropped on my doorstep. *sigh*

I will hold my breath in hope that this will all pass soon, surely I will pass out from lack of oxygen soon enough...and I am sure you will hear about that.

This wasn't supposed to be about my life...but alas here we are.

Good news- Christmas is on it's way...time for a new header! Get ready!!!

"These tears we spill, they haunt us still..."

My life has fallen apart...

My mother has small cell lung cancer...

Smile!

Here is a little something to brighten your day:

Video chat rooms at Ustream

House: Hmm I have now watched the new epi, and it was very predictable in the end. I hoped and hoped it would turn differently..but no. I was disappointed. Not my favorite epi by far. We'll see how this all unfolds. ^.^